Oh, Jiminy!

Well, I won’t be going to see the one day cricket match between South Africa and England on Newlands. No tickets left! Granted, my friends and I waited too long to go and get the tickets (match is on Sunday, I think). Still I blame the English! Them and their bloody Barmy Army! Half the tickets were probably already sold to them before they became available to the South African public. These people travel the world to support their team, robbing the locals of a chance to see their team play a home international match. And do you know how they can afford to do it? Because, somewhere back in England, there are South Africans doing their work for them! Bah! I also blame the Barmy Army of a total lack of imagination: how can you be content to chant “Ba-me-Army!” for hours on end??

Those two old gentlemen on the TV ad really had me fired up for the match.

We lost the test series against England 2-1, but I don’t blame the boys. They’ve had a rough time the past few months. They are far from the form they could (or should) be in, but did well against a team which is regarded as one of the best in the world.

Much respect goes out to the Bangladeshi team who won their first test series ever the other day (their 100th test match coincided with their 3rd test victory). To the Zimbabwean team: better luck next time!

Twenty Years In The Making

The doctor’s wife told my mother that, if I turned out to be a girl, then they should call me Pulani, which means ‘She comes with the rain’. Twenty years later dry thunder clouds hung over the Cape for the entire day whilst the rest of the country mostly had rain. While this may have seemed an ominous start to the new school year, it also marked two decades of ‘me’. That’s right: the ‘ones’ column reset and the ‘tens’ column advanced one.

Yeah, it hard to believe – the other milestones feel like yesterday: eighteen, sixteen... But I won’t digress into the past. The future starts now and already past failures feel obsolete and achievements insignificant when I consider even the prospect of what may lie ahead.

The day itself was pretty quiet, but in the evening I took a few friends out for drinks. Many have already started with their ventures for the year and others are preparing and moving around (some even had exams already), but it was good to gather a few familiar faces. My birthday is at a somewhat awkward time – most of the time it coincided with the beginning of school. My classmates must have thought school is a great place when they were treated to cake on the very first day of grade one. But I still have a week before I even have to consider my responsibilities for the year, so it’s great to have a carefree birthday for a change. ;-)

Thursday I attended a Second Years’ (“sophomore”) function at the medical campus and had a chance to see that caucus again. Hehe, trust them to have a cheese and wine function without cheese. I was busy breaking ground; that was the second time this week I visited that campus. Last Sunday it was with another friend doing a brief tour of the Promised Land before he returned to London where he will reside for another year (Nev, if you read this, have a great year, enjoy everything and keep doing the good work, where ever you are).

Took the weekend a little slow. I see they made a few obvious changes the CS module I had last year. Figures they’d do it now. Anyway...

To all my friends and family (past and present), thank you for every thing! I appreciate each and every one of you and without you; the journey would have been somewhat a waste.

Let the lame speak

I didn’t think that somebody who is not a visiting Briton can burn so badly. I looked like an embarrassed crayfish on heat. To compound the agony even further, my muscles are still sore from playing beach soccer two days ago. Aah, fun...

Well, it was fun. The few days by the sea and in the sun did me good. Everyone needs their share of (reasonably) isolated peace from time to time. I’m back now, however, and I’m done gallivanting around outside the greater unicity for now. I only have two weeks of vacation left and after that I am faced with my second year at university. Apparently US has decided to shorten the academic year to two semesters of fourteen weeks each. This is great news... if you are studying a BA course. For those of us who have modules like the infamous Mathematics 244, this move has increased the pressure ever so slightly. Honestly, Mathematics, even from school days, is the only subject I know where the lecture time is fully utilized and in the end time still runs out before the syllabus has been covered to satisfaction. But we shall persevere. I believe the first year was there to sift through all the hopefuls to find those who actually want to stick. In the second year, workload increases to test the metal of those who made it. I foresee (probably naively) that in the third year will provide some relative relieve. Tally ho! In the next two weeks I’m going to explore the possibility of perhaps rewiring my course a bit. If I can succeed, this will mean that I’ll only have two subjects on which I’ll have to write exam! For the rest I’ll only be evaluated on throughout the course of the appropriate semester. Mixed blessings.

When I returned earlier today I found that, in my absence, Bevermol has left our enclave and headed north to go study at RAU this year. This caught me completely by surprise. There had been rumours that he might leave, but I mostly discarded this as mothers’ idle gossip. I have had not seen or heard from him for the entire holiday, so I wasn’t in the clue to anything. Well, Bevermol (or whatever incarnation you dream of next), I wish you the best for the year! Cheers!

A few places to go to and people to see still. I’ll raise my voice again after the two decade transition.

Back Again for 2005

“A long December, and there’s reason to believe: maybe this year’ll be better than the last.”

The very first Counting Crows song I heard was A Long December some years ago on the radio. The distinctiveness of the song and the band immediately struck me. The song is sad one - past opportunities and the hope that future times will be better. For tonight, there is a tomorrow.

So, I’m back again. This is what I do; for the past couple of years, after the part or the event or whatever, I return to my PC, listen to this song and think about the year that has passed. Then I can hold the new year close to me and hold high hopes and dreams for it: like a father holding his new born baby.

Wow, what a year. Of course, the biggest news was my first year at university (this is introspection, so world and current affairs take a back seat). I slid quite easily and comfortable into the position of the observer, staying on the sidelines and just watching everyone and everything. A friend of mine commented and the beginning of last year (well, 2003 actually) that she was tired of people and would sort of take the year off and, I don’t know, crawl a bit back into her shell. This struck me as a bit odd, seeing as it was our final year at school, but I found myself with the same desire at the beginning of last year (2004, lol) – the beginning of varsity no less. Introspection is good, but eventually you have to get out of your own head for a while, or else you’ll go insane. It’s time to get out.

This year has been very strange. My eye’s opened to many new things, but was also closed to some other things. I am exited by the academic prospects that lie ahead as well as challenges. But this came at a bitter price: I regressed spiritually. I have always been a faithful person, but this year I found the onslaught of inner conflicts to be particularly strong. There are many reasons for this: bitterness, fear, anger, disappointment as well as others. The war has been long and the damage extensive. If I want to survive, I have to stop procrastinating and take action to get help.

“When I counted up my demons, I saw that there was one for every day. With the good ones on my shoulder, I drove the other ones away.” (from Everything’s Not Lost by Coldplay)

New Year’s resolutions: I don’t have any. I don’t ever make them and can therefore never break them. The philosophy is simple: if you recognize a change worthy aspect of your life, set about to change it immediately. Putting the commitment off until the New Year is the first step in starting to fail at your good intentions.

I can say, however, that so far I have been very cryptic about things in this blog and that I want to start changing that. I am only doing this for myself and it’s not healthy to try and hide things from yourself. This is not a diary but a journey. Penning my thoughts down, I might learn more about me.

The plans for 2005 are pretty simple here on day one: I’ll be resuming with my course, but with an effort to enjoy it more. I am not entirely convinced that this is what I should be doing with my life, but I also have no indications of the contrary. So, for better or for worse, I’ll see what happens in the next 365 days with this course of action.

One of the main highlights of this year will be my brother’s wedding. Yeah! This will be in April, but the happy couple will arrive back in the country as early as February, so it’ll be wonderful to see them again. I probably spend a great deal of time again this year to consider going over to Wales, but that’ll depend heavily on finances. Blêddie Magog. Other than that, no major plans or functions or hopes or dreams. I’ll make plans more short-term. Well, I’m still deciding whether or not I want to go to the upcoming R.E.M. concert, but that’ll mean that I’ll have to get very well acquainted with their music very soon.

Still holding thumbs for a Goo Goo Dolls and/or U2 concert, but will probably only get that as early as next year (2006). Meh.

Okay, so almost everybody I personally know is very anxious to know when I’m going to get my arse in gear and find a nice girl. So I’ll just set the record straight before I start getting e-mails from strangers or stalkers or whatever asking about the same thing: I don’t personally feel rushed in this matter and I’m not going to go on a headhunt. I believe these things “happen”, even though I understand concerns about not putting myself out there. One of the things I’ve learnt about myself this past month is that my personality is wired in such a way so that things like relationships need to “make sense” and “have a purpose”. In short, I’m not wired for flings or flirts. On the plus side, I’m bound and serious about whatever commitments might cross my path. The companionship debate has been a long struggle in my mind, with both “need” and “need not” arguing strong cases. Frankly, I’m tired. Leave me alone, people. Leave me alone, mind.

I say these things, of course, with the audacity of assuming that I/we live to see them realize. But this is a time to dream and dare. I’ll leave you now with the same incantation with which I’ve heralded in the New Year for the past few years: Maybe this year will be better than the last.